Thursday, February 24, 2011

The Book of Guppy

It's spring break on campus. The parking is bloody AWESOME! I had a rock-star space this morning! Even though most of the 'little darlins' are heading home, on tour or community service trips - I won't get the chance to miss them. I got 14 texts from an assorted batch of kids and stupidly managed to say 'yes' to babysitting fish.

I now have 'Mollie, Bob, Sally, Kevin, He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named, and Stanley' swimming in a large bowl on my desk. My task would seem simple - feed them. I was also instructed on how to 'talk' to them. Each of the fish 'personalities' were described in detail to me. REALLY? They are 98 cent FISH!

Mollie, Bob, Sally, Kevin, He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named, and Stanley have collective owners - they belong to Kayla, Jenna, Mary, and Allison. Kayla flew home to Colorado while Jenna, Mary, and Allison left for the "Mighty Midwest Choir Tour" on a tour bus. The choir will make stops in Omaha, Kansas City, and St. Louis...HOURS upon HOURS on a bus. (A bus with LOTS of singing - I almost (ALMOST) wish I was with them...)

Last night when the three fish 'parents' brought the Fish Family to my office - Allison decided Mollie Fish was - in her words, "preggers'. She 'got on the Google' and researched the details letting us all know in her best  "I'm almost a grade-school teacher" voice that it was official - Mollie was pregnant! According to one of the Internet resources, to validate the pregnancy, one should try to observe "a dark triangular spot near the anal vent." Mind you...Mollie is the size of an uncooked lima bean and rarely slows to a stop. Here are four 'girls' (young ladies) craning their heads to find the appropriate 'vent' while laughing uncontrollably. Somehow it refreshing to know that even techno-savvy, helicoptered, educated and pampered young women still find any reference to seldom mentioned-in-public body parts hysterically funny.

I was given strict instructions to text all four of them "at the SAME time" when the blessed event occurs. I reluctantly told them, "you do realize that 'house fish' frequently feed on their young... They were HORRIFIED! The "I'm almost a grade-school teacher" got back on the Google to verify my gruesome fish fact. They instructed me to diligently watch for the birth and then swoop in to save the 'youngins' from a fish feeding frenzy. SURE! I'll just video stream the bowl for the next two weeks to my iPod watching every nano second for the crowning and birthing of diminutive GUPPIES!

This morning one of my several texts was from one of the 'prospective parents' inquiring of the status of Mollie mom-to-be. I texted ALL of them at the same time, "Mollie appears to have either just had a severe case of constipation or she has given birth. Mollie is looking quite slender but the rest of the crew looks very satiated. If you don't know what satiated means - 'get on the Google' or ask the 'I'm almost a grade-school teacher'". Reply texts included: "I bet Kevin ate the babies I never did like that Kevin"; "that is epically sad", "please try to comfort Mollie"...

Little do they know I separated Mollie from the rest of her 'fish family'. On the off chance that she is actually "preggers" she now has some privacy and clumps of rocks to hide the wee ones. If a birthing is eminent she better hurry up because I will need to de-fish-a-fy, scrub, and fill the candy dish before "the children' get back from break. (Before YOU become horrified - I only fill it with individually wrapped candy.) Why did I hit them with such a sad and untrue texted tale? Well...this way when they get home if there a guppy-ettes they will be thrilled. If no guppy off-spring...they were already braced for it... AND I won't get hourly texts requesting a labor and delivery update!

And there you have a day in the life of a Career Development/Dorm Mother...

This card is for Sara, the research librarian, on campus. We have bonded over our  love of books - the weight in your hand...the smell of the pulp...the cracking of the spine when you're lucky enough to be the first to read it... and our contrasting love of technology and e-books. And we both like 'really, really NICE paper! Since she is a paper 'freak', like me, I thought I would make her a set of cards. This is the first one.


The Borrower's
~Base card - Gina K Designs Pure Ivory - edges distressed using the edge of a metal ruler and smudged with Stampin' Up Chocolate Chip and Distress Ink Antique Linen
~All four layers of design paper are Basic Grey Basics Manila and Basics Kraft collections
~Chipboard photo corner
~Images are from Stampin' Up Stamp of Authenticity set using Stampin' Up Chocolate Chip and Really Rust
~Brown cardstock tab created using tab punch and held in place with staple
~Vintage seam binding (a gift from sister Gail)
Challenges
Do You Stack Up - anything goes
4 Crafty Chicks - photo inspiration
Simon Says Stamp - Coffee and Cream
Anything Goes - distressing
Party Time Tuesday - anything goes
There She Goes - lined art only - no coloring, no shading

Thanks for clicking by.
Nancy in Iowa

16 comments:

  1. Nancy...aren't books just the best. I have been looking at an ireader, but it just can't compare to holding a book in your hands and turning the pages with excitement. Good luck with the fishy crisis. Hope it all works out.

    Onto your fabby card! I just love the colors, layers and the book card is just awesome. A perfect card for a person who loves to read. Thank you so much for sharing your inspiration with us at 4 Crafty Chicks. It is a stunning card. Glad you got some inspiration from Lori's challenge. Have an amazing day!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Nancy, I am still wiping tears off my face from the fish story!! This card is a book-lover's dream and I'm sure will be a treasured memento. Beautiful composition and so many interesting things to catch the eye.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Fabulous card, love the papers. Good luck with the fish sitting.
    Thanks for joining us at Simon Says Stamps Challenge this week.
    luv
    Debby

    ReplyDelete
  4. Wonderful story, you can't beat a good book!!! and this story is very relevant to me at the moment as we have also invested in fish and unlike your story our Mollie fish had an unplanned pregnancy. We were left with trying to fend off Angel fish to save them... We managed to save 2!! LOl
    I love your card too...
    Hugs
    Tamara

    ReplyDelete
  5. Hi Nancy - nice to see you joining in at DYSU. This card is awesome and I can't wait to see the next one you make. I love it!! Hugs Denise xx

    ReplyDelete
  6. hi Nancy, how are you doing?
    wonderful that you joined our challenge at DYSU
    love your card

    hugs
    Miranda

    ReplyDelete
  7. Wow, Nancy! This "book card" is awesome! I love how you used my photo inspiration to come up with your project :) Good luck fish-sitting....and talking to them ????? LOL...thanks for playing with us at 4 Crafty Chicks :)

    ReplyDelete
  8. great card absolutly love it, thanks for joining us at anything goes x sue x

    ReplyDelete
  9. Really neat book-like card! Love those BG kraft papers. I’m glad you joined us for the DYSU Anything Goes challenge & hope to see you again!

    ReplyDelete
  10. YOU are HILARIOUS! Love your tales from the deep... ur... uh, FISH TALES! Or would that be, FISH TAILS.... ack, ack, ack... Are you getting that I could go on and on! Well, finally, there's the fact that you are SO kind to baby sit ALL that! I hope the wee-babes are hatched, successfully, but if not - you deserve a NICE DINNER OUT or somethin'! ALL THAT on your plate and you STILL had time to make this beauty! Some of my FAVORITE stamps are smilin' at me off of this fine and lovely creation! Well done - you are extremely THOUGHTFUL & talented! What a great post! Here's to a relaxing weekend! Craft ON, sista!

    ReplyDelete
  11. Nice color choice...Cool take on the picture. Love it. Thanks for playing this week. At 4 Crafty Chicks!

    ReplyDelete
  12. Hi Nancy, so cool you joined our anything goes challenge art DYSU, hope you are doing fine? Your card is wonderful! Janna

    ReplyDelete
  13. Absolutely love it! Thanks for joining us at Do You Stack Up.

    -Wenche

    ReplyDelete
  14. Love the babysitting tale! How "motherly" of you to undertake that. Your card is marvelous and I especially love the bow!

    ReplyDelete
  15. Oh wow!! Gorgeous ribbon!! I like the corner detail too!

    Thanks so much for entering the Simon Says Stamp Challenge!!!

    -Sarah

    ReplyDelete
  16. Wonderful card!! Love the look of the clipboard. Funny story about the fish!! Thanks for joining us on the Simon Says Stamp Challenge blog!!! I hope to see your beautiful creations again soon!
    xoxo, Christine

    ReplyDelete

Thank you for taking the time to leave a note. Each is read and appreciated.